The first initial thoughts flooding into my head were how insincere this post-modern victorian steampunk universe was but that’s just Del Toro for you. He has an ability not unlike Wes Anderson or Tim Burton to create a truly unique set design like he previously did in Pan’s Labyrinth. Once I acclimated to this I was actually able to appreciate it and weirdly enough, it ended up being the only thing I really loved about this movie. Objectively ignoring the fact that I don’t find it “scary”, this movie is gorgeous.
The fatal flaw here is the fact that at no point does Crimson Peak even attempt to stray from the all too familiar haunted house/ghost formula. I’ve had this movie downloaded forever with little desire to actually watch it for whatever reason. I think I kept it on my computer because Ebert praised it for its lack of CGI. Well that old fuck clearly was just hard for Toro because the only parts that showed promise to me were mostly CGI.
To me this is the quintessential victorian ghost movie that’s unfortunately already been made. Others may praise Toro for paying homage to a few of Crimson Peak‘s predecessors. For what it’s worth, this would be a solid date movie, some slight scares but sexy enough to herd those great white buffalos straight towards our dongers.