(1978) Invasion of the Body Snatchers

Donald Sutherland is the type of guy that sneaks in while you’re out of town to give your wife rimjobs by blowing single mustache hairs onto her asshole while sipping 30 year old scotch. Then you walk in and are like,

“what the fuck are you doing with my wife? There’s no way she’s going to climax from the anal stimulation of single mustache hairs!”

Your wife turns around, “Yeah, this really isn’t doing anything, I was just too nervous to say something.”

Donald eventually leaves with his head held high for some odd reason, he most likely never really wanted your wife in the first place. You and your wife try and work things out. You’re fine for a while but eventually the pain of infidelity wains on you and eats your relationship apart. You get up the courage to leave her but you’ve grown old and realize that you gave her the best years of your life already. She moves on painfully quick while you join a gym and start online dating to attempt to do that same. Quickly you realize that you’re making zero progress in the gym after drinking 2000 calories in beer every night. To make matters worse, the only internet girls who are interested have a tooth to gum ratio so abhorrent that social justice warriors start to take offense to the inequality of what’s going on in these girls mouths. Finally, as your sitting in your old recliner that’s become the sole sanctuary from your crippling social anxiety, you just wonder, “Why do the large gum small teeth girls smile the hardest in pictures?”

I love this fucking movie with all my heart, it’s seriously one of the best alien invasion movies I’ve ever seen. It’s drenched in dread from start to finish, a film that never gave you a safe moment to take a breath.

Both Donald Sutherland and Brooke Adams are charismatic leads that sell themselves completely to role. Oh my god, fucking Leonard Nimoy is basically Spock in this and it works beautifully, he’s legitimately perfect for his role.

The effects are great and not in any way overused as most of the creepy element comes from the fact that we don’t know the real people from the aliens. Overall, the movie looks fantastic and it’s extremely well shot with great photography direction.

I’m fucking beaming while writing this, the ending blew me away. It reminded me of why I love the genre so much and it was such a genuine scare that I knew this was going straight into my favorites collection.

9.5/10

 

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Author: Ben

26 year old cheeseburger addicted horror junkie

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