(2017) Mayhem

It’s very easy to compare Mayhem to this year’s other office-building bloodbath, The Belko Experiment and I can assure you, this one is better. After The Babysitter, Samara Weaving has my attention and Steven Yeun is great as well.

I really don’t have too much to say about this one besides, it’s super brutal, entertaining and doesn’t take itself seriously. The production value is tight and there isn’t some big message being pushed, more like an outlet for some sick vicariously enjoyed fantasies.

I just wanted to add that I really don’t feel like this film is trying to overstay its welcome in any fashion. I mean during the actual running time, as well as how it fits into the general horror catalogue. Where it lacks in being inventive, it makes up for in spades with a delightful, mindless break from my own existence.

7.5/10

 

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(2016) Colossal

Colossal is like a bad Hancock, which is pretty bad since Hancock is a bad Hancock. Anne Hathaway is awful and Jason Sudeikis is actually really disingenuous too.

I just don’t like Anne because of her face so my complaints there could be null for some but I’m actually a fan of Jason and this film, unfortunately, really showed how one note of an actor he really is. When he attempts to sob it’s just god awful.

Mostly though, like the Hancock reference, it’s just the unnatural injection of conflict that really shits on everything. I mean I didn’t actually expect the initial intriguing idea to evolve into anything close to meaningful but the metaphors in this were so heavy handed, they might as well have been fisted up my asshole. I can actually feel Jason’s fingers up there, writhing around with that trademark smile just saying, “yeah? you get it, right?”

It’s so tonally disconnected that I can’t fathom it being considered as horror but I heard about it on r/horror and that’s why it’s here, which is fine by the way.

3/10

(2017) Brawl in Cell Block 99

I loved Vince Vaughn in this and it was filmed in the same ultra-violent, ultra…like…you know, that kind of- Have you ever watched 60fps porn? It’s that kind of filmmaking where you’re taken out of the moment a bit to admire the camerawork while also being even more engaged, if that makes sense.

I just loved it, incredibly brutal. If you dug the actually filmmaking from the directors other film, Bone Tomahawk, you’ll love this.

8/10

(1987) A Nightmare on Elm Street: Dream Warriors

I think this is my favorite one in the series (so far). It’s absolutely ridiculous but so good. For a film in this specific franchise, you couldn’t really ask for anything more.

The only complaint I really have is that Heather Langenkamp’s acting is really weak. I get that they wanted to bring her back but I’m not feeling her at all.

Everything else is a huge plus though. The practical effects are unreal. Its creepy and dynamic set designs will entertain all horror fans alike. Whether you’re 8 years old and about to never sleep again or 28 and desensitized from life, this isn’t a sequel to miss.

7/10

(2016) House on Willow Street

This film is pretty ridiculous and has some serious acting and screenwriting issues. There’s really just not a whole lot of tension.

Some of the effects and shit are cool but some are incredibly shitty so it balances out.

It’s kind of a stupid concept in general. What’s original doesn’t seem to ever work out and what’s unoriginal isn’t even executed well. Pretty shit movie.

2/10