(2014) Zombeavers

I can confidently say this movie is being underrated as fuck. It knows exactly what it is and that’s a spectacular horror-comedy romp.

The title honestly tells you everything you need to know but I’ll just note that this movie is actually funny. Not only that, effects range from legitimately awesome to hilariously over-the-top.

I love Zombeavers!



(2013) The Thingy: Confessions of a Teenage Placenta

This movie is seriously so fucking funny and clever. It’s so out of bounds but nothing like some of the “I’m so random” films that have been made recently.

The creature design, as well as the practical effects both rock and the complete ambivalence of the cast to the absurdity was the best part. It’s dynamic, violent and original; a total throwback monument to the 80’s.

However, 1/5 of every fucking frame was blurry. I literally took of my glasses 6 times to make sure. What the fuck is this shit? How can you ruin a movie like this?

Please fix it.



(2017) Dead Shack

This was a pretty funny horror-comedy but I felt it was kind of suffering from a common problem with indie flicks. It’s this odd timing of dialogue that never feels natural. The only way I could describe it would be to say they cram an extra second (or less) between speech exchanges. It’s odd.

The dad character was so fucking funny though, for that reason alone I’d say it’s worth a watch. It’s nothing spectacular but whatever.


(2015) Dark Forest

Dark Forest is actually a pretty funny little indie slasher that dodged some of my usual super-low-budget criticisms but unfortunately, wasn’t exempt from all of them.

The thing I enjoyed most about this film was the actual written dialogue. I had problems with the delivery at times but the actual writing itself was hilarious.

Another strong point was in regards to the visual effects. Despite being low-budget, there’s a lot of creativity in managing quick camera cuts to amplify the speed and power of certain actions. I was pleasantly surprised.

There’s some technical problems but nothing too noticeable besides what I assume was some post-production dubbing not being quite in sync. All-in-all though, a strong effort from newcomers that really showed a lot of promise.


(2017) Tragedy Girls

This was suggested to me today and I just went ahead and watched the fucking thing and let me just say boys…

Don’t fucking dive when you’re sick. Those wavers that they make you sign are for a reason, still can’t hear out of my left ear. I mean I can hear nothing out of this ear.

Anyways, movie was shit, mostly.


(2010) Piranha 3D

Clearly I did not watch this in 3D but even if I did I can safely say that 3D fucking sucks.

Now that I got that off my chest, on to the real shit. The film opens with terrible CGI which is then laced throughout the entire movie. I hate this in good movies and I hate it in bad ones. Give me all the shlock you got but hire a goddamn competent special makeup effects person.

Which…they did! When I say the bad CGI is laced throughout the rest of the movie, the other part of that is fantastic practical effects. The main scene (you’ll know what I’m referring to) is a smile-inducing, ballet of carnage.

It’s stupid, it’s fun, it’s also stupid but you know, fun.