(2002) Eight Legged Freaks

This was kind of an odd success in my mind. The plot is so cliche that it almost works to its benefit. The somewhat-shitty CGI combined with spider roars, tucked in under a blanket of nonsense leeds me to believe it’s all intentional.

It’s fun, albeit limited in certain aspects but I dug it.

6.5/10

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(2004) The Card Player

Straight up, literally can’t tell if this shit is dubbed originally or not. There’s definitely some american actors and yeah, I don’t know what’s going on.

It’s easily the worst Argento film I’ve ever seen, by a mile. It’s not only a poorly made film on a technical level but it’s painfully uninteresting.

There’s some seriously great shots though and they only seem to make it more disappointing.

It’s like glitter in shit.

4/10

(2012) Antiviral

Brandon Cronenberg’s debut feature is a gross, piteous statement on celebrity obsession and I loved every minute of it.

It’s shot remarkably well for a debut and the kid honestly shows so much talent straight out of the gate. The statement being made can seem simplistic at first but it’s approached on such an abstract level. It’s very much an original film, which is one of the best compliments I can give any modern horror film.

7.5/10

(2000) Leprechaun in the Hood

I actually think this might be my least favorite of the bunch, which is strange, being that it’s the only one I ever hear talked about.

I just kind of think the humor is a bit too slapstick-y. It’s not that I hate that style but it doesn’t really aline with the humor of the past films which was achieved through sheer absurdity. There’s way less body horror too.

It’s aight.

Nah it’s pretty bad.

3.5/10

(1994) Leprechaun 2

This movie is fucking ridiculous and honestly pretty amazing. It’s so over the top and shitty, I absolutely love it.

Warwick Davis is actually pretty great as the leprechaun. The style, story and overall execution of the film is as sloppy as ever but he’s iconic. I actually got grossed out while eating my fruit loops while looking at his gross, black lips.

I prefer this one to the original. It nails down the best death scene of the series (thus far) and manages to use a fantastic set of tits to do so.

5.5/10